Kermit and Ms. Piggy

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Q: Why did Kermit the Frog break up with Ms. Piggy?

A: He found out it was morally wrong to eat pork.

Kermit and Ms. Piggy

hot

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is it hot in here or am i sweatin!

hot

yo mama

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yo mama was so stupid when she came in the house smelling bad,
she goes i better take a bath before the fire alarme goes off!!

yo mama

Stranded

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I wish we wernt stranded on this iceburg steven whats for dinner
we can have ratsoup ratdogs or roastrat whats for desert icetea
and snow balls.
Wait i think i can see something get the telascope yes its a
ship were saved yes whats it called the titanic.

Stranded

Tigger

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Why did Tigger get his head stuck in the toilet?

He was looking for Pooh.

Tigger

Teens Over 18

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Recently I was watching a Ricki Lake show and like all talk
shows it shows ads for upcoming shows. The ad for this was
asking for teens to call in if they had a deep dark secret they
were keeping from their parents and wanted to reveal it. But at
the bottom of the screen it states that, you must be over 18 to
call. Know many teens over 18?

Teens Over 18

Evil Overlord Handbook Part Two

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11. I will not order my trusted lieutenant to kill the infant who is
destined to overthrow me — I’ll do it myself.

12. I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum — a small
hotel well outside my borders will work just as well.

13. I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need to
prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving my weaker
enemies alive to show they pose no threat.

14. I will not waste time making my enemy’s death look like an accident -
I’m not accountable to anyone and my other enemies wouldn’t believe it
anyway.

15. I will make it clear that I do know the meaning of the word “mercy”; I
simply choose not show them any.

16. One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws
in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before
implementation.

17. All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least have several rounds of
ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the
cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying
celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal.

18. My undercover agents will not have tattoos identifying them as members
of my organization, nor will they be required to wear military boots or
adhere to any other dress codes.

19. The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any
other form of last request.

20. I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find
that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate
when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into
operation.

Evil Overlord Handbook Part Two

Bewajah dete rahey Log

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Be wajah dety rahy l0g M0bbarak Naye saAl ke,,,,; * ,,+ +,, ,,+ *;;* ,,+ +,, ,,+

Aik hindsa hi t0 bdla hai taqdeEr t0 nahi…

   

Bewajah dete rahey Log

Mere Dil Se

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Mery Dil se khel to rahy hooo.

Par zara Dehaaan se.

Tota howa hai.

Kahin Lag na jaye…

Mere Dil Se

Mere Pyar ki woh inteha

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Mere Pyaar ki Wo Inteha Pochte Hain,

Dil Mai Hai kitni jagah Pochte Hain.

Chahte Hain Hum Unko khud Se Ziyada,

Is Chahat ki Bi Wo Waja Pochte Hain.

Mere Pyar ki woh inteha

Uski Justuju

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*… Uski Justuju, Uska Intezar Aur Akela pan…..!!!

*… Thak kar Muskura Deti Hun, Jab Roya Nahi  Jata,

Uski Justuju

Mere Dil Se

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Mery Dil se khel to rahy hooo.

Par zara Dehaaan se.

Tota howa hai.

Kahin Lag na jaye…

Mere Dil Se

Kisi ko kuch dena hai to

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“kisi ko kuch dena hy to usy acha Waqt Aur Dua do,

Q k ap her cheez wapis ly sakty ho magar kisi ko diya hwa acha waqt or dua wapis nai le sakte.

Kisi ko kuch dena hai to

Nahin Rehta Koi Shaks

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Nah¡ Rehta ko¡ Shaks Adho0ra k¡s¡ Cheez k Pechy,,

Waqat Guzar h¡ Jata hY, Kuch Paa Kr B, Kuch Kho Kr B..

Nahin Rehta Koi Shaks

Usay to Torna Ata Tha

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Usay To Torna Ata Tha usny Tor dia..

Woh janta hi dil ki Ehm iat Kia Ha. .

Usay to Torna Ata Tha